Well, I am off out early today, got to be at the hospital for 9:00am for my latest CT scan. I have been feeling really well and hoping this is emulated in the scan. I will get the results next week. I am feeling terrified, feel like I could burst into tears, feeling sorry for myself. I know how lucky I am to be here and how good my life is.
I know how much i have had since that awful 6 - 9 months diagnosis, but I want more, I am not ready to go anywhere.
The feeling I have this morning is one of just crying, doesn't help that I have just started my period so hormones every where. It's at times like this I feel so on my own, so lonely. I really hate these days, it is so beautiful outside, the sun is shining and I should feel happy, I am still here, so why do i want to cry and feel so sorry for myself?
Theo has been a super star, I want him to continue being a super star, I want to give him a gap year, give him some time off, take a break, go and meet up with Mr Nasty (Mavis Nye's tumour) and jet off to the states and meet up with Phil (Heather Von St James' tumour) and kidnap that naughty tumours that are bugging Janelle and Larry in the USA. Infact just hire a bus and take them all with you. I am imagining them all with there silly hats and bad shirts with camers round their necks, taking pictures of everything they see. Have a great time boys and please....please.... don't hurry back!!!!